I have to get over this the queasiness that takes over me everytime the thought of blood coming right out form my body comes into my mind.
I hate it. It makes me feel so weak.
We talked about blood today at the office. Well, it was about donating blood really. And while the conversation is going on, my imagination ran wild. Leche! I started imagining myself donating blood, started imagining the needles, and the tubes, and started imagining MY BLOOD flowing right out of my body. The effect was so quick. I had difficulty breathing. I felt like vomiting. In fact, I feel like I’m going to be sick right now just be recalling what went to my head earlier.The annoying thing is, not one person around me felt the same way. Sure, imagining their blood flowing out of their body is not their Kryptonite, but it just frustrates me to feel so queasy like that, and about that.
The thing is, I have no problem with blood. No, not really. I've seen a bloody scene before. Well, not a drop of my blood was involved, but still, it did not bother me. In fact, I feel confident enough to say that if I'd seen, say example my co-workers donating their blood, it wouldn't bother me at all. Just that, thinking about my blood flowing out of my veins makes me nauseous.
I remember it started about two years ago, during my annual physical exam at the company where I used worked. I was on blood pressure medication (still am, unfortunately). The medical technologist then tried to get my blood, but my blood pressure fluctuated so low, my blood refused to be go out my body ( I vividly remember feeling like what I'm feeling right now as I am typing this --- lightheaded and drowsy). So, after a few moments of rest, she managed to get my blood sample (using a syringe) with my other arm. I distinctly recall that it was the first time I felt dizzy because of the thought of my blood flowing out of my body.
I remember a particular Naruto episode (sorry, my anime geek side needed to talk about this). There was this one character, she's strong and all, but then the sight of blood made her nervous (she's got hemophobia). However, considering we are talking about the made up world of Naruto here, her fear of blood was immediately cured within the next few episodes through seeing Naruto struggle to be alive (it took about a few hours on their timeline). I'm doomed, aren't I? You know what I did earlier, so that none of my co-workers would notice? I tried to breathe. I just focused on inhaling and exhaling, letting the air flow in and out of me. A few minutes after that and I was okay.
